I’ve read that bonding with your horse is important. I’ve also heard horsepeople say that bonding has led to a better working relationship with their horses. What does bonding actually mean? Is it really that important? If so, how do I go about bonding with my horse?

Sue Martin
Fallon, Nevada

Bonding with your horse is important, because it allows you and your horse to have a positive relationship. When you have a positive relationship with your horse, he’ll look forward to working with you. Build a bond of mutual respect and trust. Once your horse truly respects and trusts you, he’ll be willing to put forth every effort to learn what you’re teaching him.

Bonding is all about establishing closeness with your horse, with you as his “herd leader.” I bond with every horse that I teach. Most of the time, this happens very quickly, but some take longer to bond with than others. Once I establish a solid bond, the horse will allow me to become the leader. If that doesn’t happen, I can’t teach the horse. I have to be the teacher, and he has to be the student. It works the same way with you and your horse.

Here are several ways you can enhance the bond with your horse.

• Learn his body language. Horses “talk” to us all of the time; we just have to understand what they’re saying. For instance, when your horse moves his ears back toward you, he’s paying attention to you. If one ear is back or to the side, he’s listening to something in the environment. A head toss could indicate fatigue or mouth pain from the bit. A tail swish or wring can indicate he’s upset. Pawing means he’s anxious and impatient. Showing teeth and pinning back ears means he’s very upset and might bite. On the other hand, when he licks his lips, this means he’s relaxed and comfortable.

• Understand his point of view. Horses are prey animals and think of humans as predators. It isn’t natural for a horse to allow a human to put a bit into his mouth, jump on his back, and be in charge. As you work with your horse, realize how much your horse has to trust you to allow you to do these things. Teach him that you aren’t going to behave like a predator by being kind and patient.

• Understand herd dynamics. Horses are also herd animals. When you’re with your horse, you and your horse make up a herd of two. If you establish a bond of mutual respect and trust, your horse will allow you to be “the leader of the herd.” He’ll be willing to let you be his teacher.

• Avoid abusive tactics. Establish yourself as your horse’s benevolent leader who guides him in a positive direction. Abuse, force, and fear tactics lead to pain, which will cause your horse to resent you, creating an unhealthy human/horse relationship. Your horse will cease to trust you, and your bond will be severed. While it’s possible to re-establish the bond, it’ll take a lot of time and patience.

• Allow him to make mistakes. Once you’ve established a leadership position through patient work, you can then start to teach your horse a positive work ethic. Allow him to make mistakes. Don’t get frustrated. Just show him what you’re asking of him again. You may have to show him many times before he understands exactly what you are asking him to do, but you have to be very patient with him. Horses are living beings just like us, and they make mistakes just like we do. Understand this and accept it.

• Hit the trail. After you’ve built a bond with your horse through patient training, and he feels secure with you as his leader, take him on a trail ride. If you’ve done your job well, he’ll look to you for security, rather than other horses that may be along on the trail. You should be able to guide your horse away from the others, if you wish, without upsetting your horse. He won’t get upset, because he’ll feel secure following your leadership.

Trainer/clinician J.F. Sheppard specializes in responsible training for trail horses, and safe horsemanship for trail riders. He’s certified under top Paint Horse trainer William T. Lawrence. In his 50s and afflicted with osteoarthritis, he continues to actively ride and train. The southern Oregon resident can be reached at flyingeagle@ccountry.com. For clinic information, visit www.horsecreekoutfitters.com.